Your children need your presences more than your presents.It is some parents reaction to grab a child and spank them or yell at them when they are in danger or have upset you by their actions. But we should do the exact opposite! We shouldn’t grab a child and scream at them for something they have done, instead we should embrace them and move them away from the situation and then talk with them about their behavior. I once read an interesting analogy related to how we discipline our children. Imagine you have just seen your child walk into the middle of a very busy road, your reaction is to grab them and remove them from that dangerous place and most likely hold them and tell them how much you love them. You would not stand in the middle of the road and spank them or yell at them for what they did. When your child is in danger, or traffic, remember that holding them first will teach them their greatest lesson before you angrily react to their actions.
First, you can not love your children too much, it is simply not possible to spoil them with love. I look my children in the eyes multiple times a day and I tell them I love them.Do not replace the love you have for your child with things you can buy them.
Second,is be involved in your child’s life. In today’s society of tv, laptops, ipads and cell phones it can sometimes be hard to verbally communicate with others. But do not let these devices interfere with the relationship you have with your children. Being an involved parent takes time, hard work and sometimes it requires sacrifice on only your part. It may replace what you want to do with what your child needs you to do. But there is nothing more important than being there both mentally and physically for your child. Have a limit on how long you do your “work” from home. Set a timer.
Third, don’t except your children to behave if you don’t explain the rules and decisions you make. Parents have expectations they want their children to live up to but you have to talk with your child about them. You can’t expect a two year old to know how they are supposed to behave and believe it or not the same goes for a thirteen year old. What is obvious to you will not be obvious to them unless you tell them so. You can talk to them at family council or even go as far as writing your family rules on a chart.
Fourth, and sometimes the hardest thing to do is to foster your child’s independence. Setting limits helps your child develop a sense of self-control. Encouraging independence helps children to also develop self-direction. Children need both of these characteristics in order to be adults in this world. Remember that the ultimate goal of a parent is to raise a child to grow up and leave your home and be able to create their own. If you’re constantly making choices for your child they will not learn to be independent successful people.
The fifth, and one of the most important parental tips is to treat your child with respect. The best way to get respect from your child is to respect them first. You should give your child the same respect you would give anyone else. Sometimes we treat our own flesh and blood a little harsher than we would treat strangers but that’s where we have it backwards. Our children should be treated the best and even better than we treat others! We should pay attention to them, speak kindly and show consideration to them. I have learned through my years of being a mother and experience that children treat others the way they are treated.
Parents can find help with their important roles online, through apps, on tv or through books but always remember our most important resource is turning to our Heavenly Parents. Their love and guidance will help us through all of our parental challenges and triumphs. Sitting and praying to our Father above is the best council we will ever receive because He has his children’s best interest at heart.